My Spam Is Your Spam

keep her entertained and swinging off your manhood
(That shit will be like a moss covered vine straight out of the Amazon. Make sure you get her a loincloth before taking MegaDik!! Tarzan ain't got shit on me!!!)

Bigger penis won't be on TV but in your shorts!
(... Good? I really don't think my TV's penis needs to be any bigger. I bought it for screen size, not the size of it's package. Really, the cat is the only one who uses it anyway.)

Do you want to enjoy an average penis and average women? We don.t think so. And so we offer something special to you.
Mega means "great". And this new development MegaDik makes your ramrod just great!
Buy it and enjoy your new sexual experiences!
You.ll be so wondered...
(Wondered I am indeed. Hehehe.... Ramrod.)

Have you ever heard this, "Gush! Your penis is really tiny!"?
Didn't you feel stupid?
Don't let girls prefer dildo to you ! Megadik will improve your situation once and forever! You must believe in this magic preparation!
"Gush! Your penis is so large!" Is it what you just love to hear?
Soon you'll be the only one girls will want! Megadik is your real cure!
(I've never heard that. Probably because my name isn't Gush. I haven't even heard that used as a nickname. I did know a guy called Geyser back in college, but that had nothing to do with his dick. The day I can walk into a party, shout "I have a MegaDik" and get every girl to follow me out the door is the day before I wake up with a sore dick and more STDs than I can count. But if Megadik cures all that too, then I'll take a case!)


At last you've met a babe that's hot
You wanna plough her juicy twat.
She's cute and taking, she's so nice!
But would your penile size suffice?
Not sure she will long for more?
You need a dong she would adore!
But how to raise it long and thick?
Your only hope is MegaDik!
You'll get so wanted super-size
And see great pleasure in her eyes!
Your schlong will slam her poon so deep,
Tonight you'll hardly fall asleep!
So try today this magic p'ill
And change your life at your own will!
(Fuck you Shakespeare!)